Please Stay

How do you say goodbye?  It's not painful when you know you will see that person again; it's just a little pinch to the heart.  It burns inside of you when you realize that it's likely a longstanding separation.  It lingers and aches when you know you will never see that person again.  Saying farewell is admitting that you are about to lose someone or something that is important.  Hence the difficulty that many of us have with monumental changes in our lives.
The Year of Magical Thinking is an outstanding example of the difficulty of accepting loss.  Anyone who has experienced the loss of a beloved person can identify with the author's expectation of seeing that individual occupying their usual place at the table or couch.  Accepting that the person is gone forever, is another loss.  Blue Nights is a different book of loss.  This is the anger. The inability to believe that a young person could be taken away.  Joan Didion shares the loss of her daughter and begins the process of acceptance while reminding us that the inevitable continuation of living our lives does not mean forgetting about what we've lost.
Beth Howard's book, Making Piece, about the loss of her young husband is a study in guilt.  Throughout their short married life, they experienced long periods of separation due to his employment and her unwillingness to move or live abroad.  On the day of his death, her husband was on the way to the lawyer's office to sign their divorce papers.  This was the second time they had attempted to go through the process.  Tragically, he died of a heart attack prior to signing the papers.  The author is convinced that she caused the death of her young husband.  She works through her grief and guilt by taking her hobby of making pie and sharing the love of that experience with others.





Goodbye is loss and starting anew.  Smashed by Koren Zailkckas, chronicles the author's struggles with the seductive power of alcohol which had been her social crutch for years.  She will have to give up the one thing she thinks she loves in order to connect with the real world.  In The Glass Castle, Jeannette Walls tells her tragic story through the rose tinted glasses of childhood.  Life is an unpredictable adventure with her eccentric parents.  As an adult, she comes to realize that she must separate from her parents to find happiness and stability.  Nicholas Sparks' Three Weeks With My Brother is a window into the heart and soul of brotherly love.  Though they are on the travel adventure of a lifetime, the brothers spend time sharing the joys and woes of their childhood memories and mourning the death of their beloved sister.
As we move from summer to fall, perhaps now is the best time to pick up a "goodbye book".  Fall in Wisconsin is a lovely time of year.  We live for the Packers and the local football teams.  The foliage entices visitors to drive "up north".  We put away our boats, docks and swimsuits and unpack our winter coats, snowmobiles, snow blowers, and skis.  The kids head off to school, and mourn the end of their freedom.  We live in a state of quiet anticipation while we watch everything slowly go still and dormant around us.  Summer will return but unlike the reliability of the seasons, our lives may take drastic turns and we are left wondering how long we will be saying our goodbyes before we are able to move on.

   

Old Friends

Comfortable books.  Old friends.  The tried and true.  Favorite reads.  Those authors that you keep track of in anticipation of their next volume.  Sometimes we get on a reading treadmill and it feels like we can't keep up nor are we able to get off.  Those of us who earn our keep staying current on the latest popular authors, genres, and other book trends are in a never ending reading race.  However, it would be foolish of us to forget about old friends whose meaning and message have not faded with time.
I don't know how many times I've read Pride and Prejudice (or some variation of it).  I am not ashamed to say that I have read several Jane Austen books multiple times.  My favorite fantasy books are still J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings trilogy followed closely by C.S. Lewis' Chronicles of Narnia.  According to a close friend, Ender's Game is above and beyond the best science fiction book ever written which is why he tends to read it again at least once a year. 
Gone with the Wind, The Red Badge of Courage, and The Killer Angels are books I revisit for a taste of the Civil War.  One of my all-time favorite historical books is The Autobiography of Henry the VIII written by Margaret George.  This book is written from the point of view of the court jester who has an interesting take on the various intrigues of Henry the VIII's court.  On a visit to my parents when I ran out of my own books to read (gasp!) and was tired of re-reading Agatha Christie, I was introduced to Caleb Carr's The Alienist.  
Come to think of it, most of my "comfort books" came to me through my mom.  I introduced her to The Help and she gave me Bernard Cornwell.  She leaves books like David McCullough's 1776 and Hampton Side's Ghost Soldiers at my house and I recommend Stephen Ambrose and Sarah Vowell to her.  Last time she visited, I sent a battered copy of Sarah's Key home with her for her plane ride as the fictional companion to Caroline Moorehead's A Train in Winter which she read at my house for two days straight.
Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that being in the business of books is not about how fast you can read or if you can remember the hottest new author.  Reading for pleasure and connecting with other readers is about finding the story that means something to you personally.  It may be that the book you need at the moment is NOT the latest and greatest but an old friend who will take you on a journey through the back roads of your memory to a familiar place you've visited before.  Like grandma's house, the smell of fresh chocolate chip cookies, a favorite sweater, your comfortable jeans, a hug when you need it most, a "comfort read" is the old friend that you can still relate to and want to share with others.   

The Boys of Summer and Other Hits

It has been a number of years since my husband read Bob Uecker's book about his less than illustrious baseball career and laughed out loud in the process.  Since then, I have tried to tempt him with a number of other non-fiction books but success has been limited.  Yes, despite my best efforts, he does not consider himself a "reader".  When we take a trip with a longer drive, I can normally get the entire family engrossed in a book on CD (as long as there isn't a Brewers or Packers game to listen to).  Following that, there will be a short burst of dedication to reading a book but it is usually cut short by some other distraction like the television (after all, there is probably a game of some sort on SOMEWHERE) or video games.  I have found that there are many people with busy lives who feel they don't have the time to read, and there are many people who don't consider reading to be a relaxing activity.   

Here are a few things that HAVE sparked an interest with my difficult-to-engage reader.  On our way out west, we listened to Bob Greene's Once Upon a Town with tears in our eyes and regret in our hearts when it was over.  Andy Rooney's My War, (sadly, available only on audio cassette) was filled with his trademark wit and social criticism made all the more potent because he was the narrator.  We once listened to Tolkien's Lord of the Rings trilogy and could not stop singing the Tom Bombadil song for at least three days.  I have also discovered that teen and children's fiction can keep the entire family from squabbling their way through Montana.  Series such as Lemony Snicket's Series of Unfortunate Events, Harry Potter, and Brian Jacques' Redwall can help maintain the peace in an enclosed space for hours.  The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle had us so engrossed that we almost missed the last rest area for the next 82 miles.

Back to the sport of baseball, which has many inspirational stories based on reality.  Everyone loves an impossible comeback or to cheer for the underdog.  Jim Morris' book, The Oldest Rookie, inspired the movie, The Rookie starring Dennis Quaid.  The book (and movie) Moneyball might give hope to any baseball fan, even a Milwaukee Brewers' fan.  Stories and movies like Eight Men Out or Cobb remind us that baseball is more than a game and the people playing it are fallible human beings.  However, don't we all want to remember the boys of summer through the rosy light of a Field of Dreams?

Next time you want to tempt someone into a book, try making it a shared experience by using an audio book in the car.  Or, instead of Friday night pizza and a movie, bring home the book too.  It may be the inspiration you're looking for to get someone reading again.

50 Blushes

You can't even describe 50 Shades of Grey in terms of flying off the shelves.  Its popularity rivals that of Suzanne Collin's Hunger Games trilogy.  I think we add a new person to the waiting list every day.  The excitement over these books has been generated by media attention, controversial or critical reviews, and recommendations from friends.  The bad news is that there are so many holds on this trilogy people are going to be waiting quite a while before they get their books.  The GOOD news is  there are a multitude of other books about romance and relationships to tide you over.

Laurell K. Hamilton writes two series that are somewhat similar in nature.  The main character in both series is a woman who is surrounded by strong, alpha males (as romance authors would describe them) who are used to being in charge.  In the Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter series, Anita is a necromancer who lives in an alternative reality St. Louis, MO.  She has a complicated personal life which involves romantic entanglements with vampires, werewolves, and others.  Through the course of these activities, she gradually acquires various supernatural powers as she become more deeply involved in the underworld.  Hamilton's second series focuses on Merry Gentry, a faerie princess turned private investigator who is attempting to live a human life.  Her attempts are short-lived when it is revealed that she could be the heir to the throne of her aunt (who is a queen in the realm of faeries) if she can conceive a child before her cousin.  The series follows the many assassination attempts on Merry's life while she negotiates intricate alliances with faeries (and other creatures) while attempting to conceive a child.  Be forewarned, these books are not for the faint of heart.  The romantic encounters are graphic and involve characters who are supernatural creatures with more than human appetites. 

For an engaging romantic read that has more to offer than the traditional "bodice-ripper", there are several outstanding authors to choose from.  Lisa Kleypas, Jude Deveraux, Stephanie Bond, and Rachel Gibson write contemporary romances that feature unique characters, entertaining situations, and snappy dialogue.  Linda Howard, Karen Robards, Jayne Ann Krentz, Elizabeth Lowell, Sandra Brown, Beverly Barton, Catherine Coulter, Jennifer Crusie, Julie Garwood and Suzanne Brockmann are some of the premier authors of romantic suspense.  Their stories often feature a hapless couple that is pulled into an life-threatening situation and the male character usually (but not always) saves the day. 

And what is so wrong or embarrassing about reading a historical romance (bodice-ripper)?  There are many authors who offer a creative storyline or a twist to the standard romantic formula.  Mary Balogh has created several series using an extended family and a recurring group of friends.  Lynsay Sands writes excellent historical romances featuring unique leading characters and hilarious dialogue.  Other notable historical romance authors include Claudia Dain, Julia London, Suzanne Enoch, Julia Quinn, Johanna Lindsey, Mary Jo Putney, and Eloisa James.
Finally, for the mature Twilight fan, Deborah Harkness has developed an outstanding fantasy world in her Book of Souls trilogy.  In Discovery of Witches, the modern world contains witches, vampires, and daemons who must work together for their own safety but are not permitted to have romantic ties with one another.  This precarious balance is upset by a witch named Diana (who has vast untapped powers) and a vampire named Matthew (whose bloodlust for Diana is exceeded only by his carnal desire for her).  This first book focuses on the courtship of the two main characters as fate leads them to defy the rules.  In the second book, Shadow of Night, the two use Diana's new found powers to travel in time back to Elizabethan England.  There they interact with many of the leading literary and historical figures of the day.  The author creates an authentic historical world which leaves the reader wishing that the characters did not have to journey back to modern times.  It is in the second book that Matthew and Diana's relationship advances to the next level. 
Are all of these titles going to be exactly like 50 Shades of Grey?  For the reader's sake, let's hope not.  People may express the opinion that if you've read one romance, you've read them all but that would imply that every romantic relationship in the world is the same.  Those readers who enjoy escaping into a good romance will tell you that each relationship is vastly different and the enjoyment comes from the author's ability to create something new from what some would describe as recycled material.

 

Degrees of Separation

Featuring retired homicide detective Baruch "Buck" Schatz

Sometimes you can read a book and it will lead you to another book (or movie) that may make sense to no one but you.  For example, I recently finished a book called Don't Ever Get Old by Daniel Friedman.  The title alone sounds like a self-help book aimed at helping you turn back the hands of time with diet and exercise.  Don't be fooled by the title.  It's a convoluted, comedic mystery set in the south whose protagonist is a cross between "Pop" from Grumpy Old Men and Clint Eastwood's character Walt Kowalski from Gran Torino.  The mystery is layered with stolen Nazi gold, interspersed with flashbacks of a German POW camp, and topped off with a present-day serial killer.  Throughout the book, there is a sense of profound personal loss intertwined with laugh-out-loud moments as Buck interacts in his unique way with the other characters, particularly his grandson "Tequila".

From here we segue into the next book recommendation.  In the course of expounding the many virtues of the above book to one of my coworkers, we started discussing WWII memoirs and how memories blur after a number of years.  The book Treblinka had been recommended to me years ago by a friend.  It has since become a book that I go back to every few years in between my other reading pursuits.  This is the kind of book that will stay with you after you turn off your light at night.  Ever since our library held a book discussion on The Seamstress by Sara Tuvel Bernstein, the two of us have had an ongoing conversation regarding accuracy in memoirs and general historical writings.  (The core of the discussion being, if someone makes themselves or their life events sound too good to be true, then it may not be completely accurate.)  Memoirs can be tricky that way.

This leads me to the next volume, Killing Lincoln by Bill O'Reilly and Martin Dugard.  The writing is so overly dramatic (at one point they describe Abraham Lincoln as "traipsing" down a hallway) as to be ridiculous.  They attempt to assign various feelings and motivations to different characters with little actual proof to back up their assumptions.  As a reader of non-fiction, I prefer that an author let the facts speak for themselves.  Comments, quotations, and writings by contemporaries of the time period are always helpful but the discerning reader of history must remember that there will be an element of human fallibility in those writings as well.  When the author interjects too much emotion into the historical event, I become a very skeptical reader.Finally, this leads to one of the best Abraham Lincoln books that I have read recently.  Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith is packed with action and adventure as it follows the life of Abraham Lincoln.  The author does an excellent job of using historical detail to lend his vampire tale authenticity.  Abraham Lincoln is a noble, larger-than-life hero who sets out to avenge the death of his mother at the hands of a nefarious vampire.  The vampires will continue to be the bane of Abraham's existence throughout his life since they are also the cause of the American Civil War.  Thank heavens Old Abe was so handy with an axe!

Also by this author-Pride and Prejudice and Zombies



That is how you get from a mystery featuring a grumpy old man to a fictional vampire hunter in just a few books.  Have a book conversation with another reader.  You'll go from dystopias to politics to adventure to romance in the blink of an eye. 

"Are we there yet?....Are we there yet?"

It's official.  It is now the time of year we all look forward to; particularly those of us that live in northern climes.  Time to make some summertime family plans.  The summer family vacation may involve hours and hours of driving across country or it could mean undergoing an invasive inspection while trying to board a plane.  These are precious moments (whether it be laughing or crying) that you get to spend together.  Believe it or not, there will come a time in your life when you will think back with nostalgia to the cross country trip(s) that included all the delights of bored children fighting, carsickness due to winding mountain roads, and contant demands (whining) to stop for food or bathroom breaks.

Perhaps your favorite times are those evenings in the backyard spent with a campfire, marshmallows and funny or creepy stories.  There are those people who are fortunate enough to have a permanent vacation spot...the family cabin "up north".  Others may enjoy the summer family camping trip.  Here in Wisconsin, there are several distinct breeds of people who go camping regularly.  The RV people (who often have a permanent spot for the camper) and the "real" campers who use tents (called "roughing it").  Then there are those hardy souls who take an extended family vacation across the country visiting the sights and spending their nights camping.  No matter how you do it, these are the moments that create the stories we share around our winter fires.

 

Some of us have a list of places we would like to visit at a future time in our lives.  One might call it the travel "bucket list".  There are a multitude of outdoor wonders and historical sites in the United States just waiting to be discovered by you.  They may lie across the country or a few miles down the road.  Maybe you want to share your favorite childhood campground or relive a family road trip with the next generation.  Whatever it may be, now is the time to share some lasting moments with the people you care about most.  It's time to hit the road.  (A road trip tip:  if you don't want to listen to the whining and fighting, try bringing along a book on CD for the kids.  It can make the miles fly by.)

Librarian, contrarian, how does your garden grow?



Books can be so versatile

"The only things that grow in my garden are weeds."  In my experience, this is the type of statement made by compliment-seeking, green-thumbed people who have fabulous, thriving gardens.  Now I on the other hand can truly say that weeds seem to prosper at my home.  In fact, the only desirable plants that grow at my house are wild, untended plants.  Wild asparagus and rhubarb (courtesy of the previous owners) are abundant in the otherwise barren wasteland of dried grass that surrounds our home.  Don't get me wrong, we like the idea of having a garden.  However, we lack the skill, knowledge, willing workers and TIME needed to put together a prosperous plot. 

I've always been attracted to the idea of container gardening.  Even though we live outside of town on a space larger than an acre, I haven't been able to muster any desire to do more than invest in a "Topsy-Turvy" tomato planter.  By that I mean, I've thought about getting one and trying it.  (I am a little shy of the "As Seen On TV" products.)  Every summer we have encouraged our daughter (who has actually shown some interest and talent in this area) to plant various vegetable seeds with the understanding that anything she plants is solely under her care.  Her success has been sporadic as it often depends on us reminding her to water and weed her small plot.  Now that she's older, she has started to abscond with all the produce since she's doing all the work. 

I blame my anti-gardening feelings on my mother.  She grew up on a farm in South Dakota.  For many years she attempted to grow a gigantic South Dakota style garden in the back yard of our Washington State home. This would have worked out fine if the plot hadn't been surrounded by enormous pine trees which took up all the nutrients from the soil and blocked the majority of the sporadic sunlight.  (There is also the endless rain factor, even in summer.)  Pulling the weeds from this futile dream of abundance was one of my childhood chores.  One learns to actively resent pulling weeds from a garden that doesn't produce anything in noticeable quantities. 

Some day in the not-too-distant future, I plan to check out some  of the gardening books from our library and follow through on the project.  Until that day, I hope that my wonderful, generous gardening neighbors will continue to share their extra zucchini, tomatoes, melons, and green beans with my family.  People tell me that gardening is rewarding and relaxing.  I guess I'd rather relax with a good book than a big plot of weeds. 



The perfect book for the gardening newbie.